Mrs Fringe Would Like To Be

Hawaii Beach House

Hawaii Beach House (Photo credit: imgdive)

here.  No, this isn’t another weather complaint.  Ok, maybe it’s a little bit of a weather complaint, but it’s actually a nice day in NY–for February.  Sunny and forty five degrees.  But really, I think it’s about the life I wish I were living.

It’s funny, because the life I am living is one many others want.  Parts of it.  New York City.  Manhattan.  Rent controlled apartment in a high rise building.  Proximity to theater, music, art.  And when I imagine life in Hawaii, I can see a lot of overlap.  Multicultural living.  Waking up to sights others dream of.  Crazy high cost of living.  Crowds.  Tourists.  Public transportation and walking making more sense than a car for daily life.  Roaches big enough to put a leash on.

New York is like a mirage for so many.  Generations keep coming.  But for every 3 who come, 2 leave.  It isn’t what they thought it would be.  The competition is too steep, too massive, the snow is too black, the apartment is too cramped, the rent is too damned high.  I imagine the same is true in Hawaii.  Well, not the black snow, but the fantasy of what life will be like compared to the reality of bills and laundry and dirty dishes.

But in Hawaii you have this.

Big Island, Punaluu Beach Park

Big Island, Punaluu Beach Park (Photo credit: Wikipedia 

What will it take for me to make peace with where I am?  I don’t know.  What would it take for me to get there?  More money than I’m ever likely to have.  Husband willing to go.  Nerd Child and Man Child willing to trade their home base.  More money.

For years I kept a reef tank, my beach house of dreams in a glass box.  Recently I broke it down, the cost of upkeep too much right now.  Much as I loved my tank and critters, and I expect I will set it up again eventually,  it isn’t much of a substitute for this.

A Needlefish is being cleaned by Rainbow clean...

A Needlefish is being cleaned by Rainbow cleaner wrasse, Labroides phthirophagus. on a reef in Hawaii at cleaning station (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

There isn’t a whole lot of me in Christina, my main character of Astonishing.  Except towards the end, when she’s dreaming of black sand beaches.  Yet I didn’t send her there.  Why?  I don’t know.  It would have been a different story, she would have been a different character.

Are you where you thought you’d be, Fringelings?  Where you want to be?

**I don’t know why the spacing is so funky today.  My mind must be somewhere else.  On a beach.  Or underwater with a school of yellow tang.

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  1. I’m not where I thought I would be. I thought I’d go back to the Jersey Shore after college, but instead met my fiancè, and we bought a house in central New York. But the kind of beach I yearn for is a no-winter beach, so not my home beaches at all. But I don’t want to deal with hurricanes and typhoons and the like so I think I want something that does not exist.


  2. There is so much compromise in Adult life. I would love to live near the sea in a warm place, I have in fact lived in such a place and it was lovely, but I chose to leave one day, to get an education, to find a Husband and I did both. Then life took over and living gets wrapped up in schools and kids and jobs. I have a dream now to live by the sea when the kids leave home, I also dream of a year in Paris and a year in Venice totally immersing in the culture. But I do love my home, there is no frantic crowds or mad rent or black snow.


  3. The grass is always (or at least appears) greener somewhere else. I lived in Paris for 10 years and moved to California where most people say they would rather be in Paris. So…
    As for Hawaii where I have been several times, it is lovely for a while. Now New York city is my kind of place. Buy again, maybe for a while. Enjoy, though!


      1. Tough question! In fact even in the US I’ve lived on both coasts. So I have a hard time to pick. I think we should live longer lives as long as we are healthy and get to stay in different places for a while. As for Paris, which I still adore when I go back, I know that it is over for good. I just like American people a lot more than the French. Hush, don’t tell them.


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