I’m not OK, You’re OK

Are you?  I hope.  More ok than that ’70’s self help book I ripped my title from, anyway.  Did anyone else have to read it for psych when they were in school?  It should have been titled the Tao of OKitude.  I don’t remember Harris’ theories, I just remember each chapter feeling like torture.  As I recall, the solution was reading while listening to the Doobie Brothers cranked on the stereo.

Publicity photo of the music group The Doobie ...

Publicity photo of the music group The Doobie Brothers. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Speaking of, I guess I’ve got the 1970’s on my brain today.  I went to get my hair cut, wanted something a little different.  Retro.  Somehow, no matter what I ask for, I always seem to walk out of the hair salon looking, umm, shall we say, suburban?  Doesn’t matter whether the stylist is male or female, young, old, or middle aged, when they see my salt and pepper hair they stop listening and give me the haircut they think is appropriate.  You’d think they’d understand appropriate isn’t high on my list, based on the fact that I don’t dye my hair, and usually walk in looking like a frizz bomb.

Today’s guy tried to ignore me, and I tried to explain.  Of course, my brain fogged with the smell of hair bleach from the woman next to me getting highlights, and  I couldn’t think of the word “shag.”  I kept saying fringe.  Can’t imagine why fringe would pop into my head.   So I made him get props.  The sad, dusty binders filled with jagged edged magazine photos.  I’m laughing just thinking of the expression on the stylist’s face, trying to decide how to tell me I don’t have straight hair.  I reassured him that I understand my hair won’t do anything other than what it wants no matter how it’s cut without major intervention.  Just make it so I can make it look reasonable when I put the effort in.

After 20 minutes of cutting, product, 25 minutes of blow drying, 20 minutes with the straightening iron, a little more cutting, a little more ironing, a little more product.  Voila!

Mrs Fringe, Smooshed, Smoothed, and Ironed

Mrs Fringe, Smooshed, Smoothed, and Ironed

Sometimes a gal just has to remind herself she knows how to be a person.  I’ve been submerged in revisions, but I’m happy to say they don’t feel hellish right now.  In fact, I’m feeling pretty good about how the story is coming together.

In celebration of sleek hair and edits that are working, I offer a song to my fringelings.


  1. thanks for the up beat update on how we have not progressed despite having tried so hard to attain OK-hood I mean. your short essay is finely humorous. i love the photogenic fine silvery doo and appreciate the music. correct procedure, like obtaining the perfect hair cut, may even force free-writing (and the Miss, Mrs. Ms.’s of any age) right back into those boxes the I’m O.K. Your O.K. manual were supposed to free us from. Wasn’t that one written by a guy? Happy Mother’s Day back…colleen


    1. Hi Colleen,
      Welcome to Mrs Fringe and thanks for joining in! 🙂

      That book certainly was written by a man, and I felt anything but freed when I read it.


  2. Your hair looks great. I love that salt and pepper look. If you have dry, frizzyish hair like me, try coconut oil just a drop mixed with your conditioner. After checking out your hair, my eye was drawn to the window and then the magnifying glass, what that be for?


    1. Thanks Diana! I’m a big fan of coconut oil, just recommended it to another friend of mine. 🙂

      The magnifying glass is for getting a better look at the tank critters. Yup, I’m a weirdo 😉


  3. I’ve gotten scared to get my hair cut, or just too lazy. And, what is that magnifying glass for? I’m usually not concerned about such things…but your explanation would probably be as outrageous as you are…OK I am.
    On my Way…


    1. You and I have much in common. My hair has been long for most of my life–because I’m too lazy to keep up on styling or trims. But sometimes it’s fun, and it always grows back. 😀

      The magnifying glass is for getting a better look at corals and critters in my tank, of course. We reefers are an obsessive bunch, you know. 😉


      1. You coral reefers ! Some little Ticas were playing with my hair the other day on the beach. Long, blonde hair with six sandy little brown hands running through it, but their laughing made the washing process a pleasure.
        On my Way…


  4. I hate getting my hair cut. When it gets too long to style I put on a hat, when it sticks out the sides of the hat like I have wings coming out of my ears I relent and get it cut. I like the salt and pepper – if mine was even like that I wouldn’t color it. Glad to hear the edits are coming along nicely!


  5. I love your description of how ummm… delicate? your stylist was attempting to be in his assessment of your hair. And I like the salt and pepper. My hair isn’t doing it that way, it’s more like huge streaks of yuck around my face and the back, where no one looks, is still mostly nice and brown. What the heck is that all about?!


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